get ready for one of the most self indulgent, boring, borderline desperate entries i have ever written. i don’t intentionally mean for it to sound all ~forlorn but i know how people interpret things, so this is a forewarning! i was just kind of doing some thinking….

since the dawn of my life, i have done almost everyone alone. females do everything together…even going to the bathroom, which even still is something i am not used to. i guess another word to use would be independent? my biggest wish was always to have a best friend. jealousy is one of the seven deadly sins, i know, but i have been so jealous of people who have that one best friend with whom they do everything together: sleep over night after night, walk into their house, call their mom “mom,” etc, etc. prepare yourselves for this romcom-esque line i am about to drop…

having a companion just like me would be really, really nice!!

companion could be a girl or a boy i guess. but i hate, hate, hate sounding like i am that girl just tryna be one of the guys! kinda like that episode of full house where dj is jealous that her once nerdy, now hot cousin (played by her in real life brother kirk, weird) gets all the attention from uncle joey, jessie and danny so she becomes jealous and tries to fit in by burping and farting and playing football but fails miserably. or like ginnifer goodwin’s character in he’s just not that into you. i digress. i hate sounding like that girl just tryna be one of the guys because i LOVE my girlfriends. i just find that i have a really weird sense of humor (if this blog isnt evidence enough) that appeals more to dudes sometimes (especially my dad, his friends, and the like, 2 male friends i have). in the directors studio in my mind, i live in a small studio apartment with a man and i clean up his messes in my ~cool tank top and underwear combo and go “OH, YOU!” when some chick does the walk of shame out of his room in the morning when i am leaving for work……pretty much the plot of someone like you, starring ashley judd and hugh jackman. not to say that the girls i hang out with don’t have a sense of humor like mine. i think it seems like my old high school friends do because they’ve just gotten used to me. college is, well, taking a while. patience is a virtue though, and from what i’ve been told, everyone good is worth waiting for..