i hate it when i have no time to blog. this week has been governed by schoolwork and that will probably continue into next week, but what can i do? oh, i know, procrastinate and watch the OLYMPICS! to be honest, i don’t care about anything else except for figure skating. although yesterday, i was reading the internet before i took a nap and saw how the luger was injured during a practice run. when i woke up, yahoo had plastered on the front page that he had died and i started crying because i was so startled. same thing happened with brittany murphy. all these young people dying lately has been a bummerville for me.

oh, side note, i am sitting in my parents room writing this and my dog just did a human fart and i jumped a mile. i thought there was a burglar in the house who had to let one rip b/c the sound that just emitted from her b-hole was NOT dog-like. i digress…

anyways, mcqueen’s death has been itching and scratching at my brain for the past few days. it eats away at me just thinking about his state of mind, thinking there are no other ways to be happy on this planet except for not being here at all. from the “trial and death of socrates,” socrates said “no one knows with regard to death wheather it is not really the greatest blessing that can happen to man; but people dread it as though they were certain it is the greatest evil.” how crazy is it to think that despite the fact that the life after this one (if there is another life after this one,) could be abhorrent, some people are still willing to take that chance just to bypass the troubles they are experiencing now.

troubled artists intrigue me to no end, especially ones that die before they hit their true potential, or at their peak; vincent van gough, kurt cobain, elliot smith, heath ledger, and cripe, even michael jackson. i know i am going to regret saying this the next time someone on the internet acts like a idiot, but sometimes there is so much beauty in the world that i can’t concentrate on anything else. my disposition also includes that everything is temporary. so while beauty and happiness can’t be with me forever, sadness can’t either so i guess i should bask in the ecstasy while i still can.

i wish that i could bake a cake made of rainbows and smiles, and we’d all eat it and be happy! rip a. mcq, you are missed horribly! your virtuosity will be imitated, ~never duplicated~

(ghetto throwback but it’s awesome)